#64: Caroline Calloway

Caroline Calloway on Austrian Black Tie, Watching Other People Play The Sims on YouTube, and What Superglue Can Fix (Everything Including The Human Body)

Cool people like cool things, which is why we asked cool person Caroline Calloway to come on Perfectly Imperfect & spread the hot rec wealth.

In the early days of Instagram, Caroline built a following for her lengthy journal-like captions chronicling her life at Cambridge University. She’s since amassed nearly 700,000 followers and continues to be one of the most prolific social media personalities of our time. This journey hasn’t been without controversy, but her embracing of the chaos and reclaiming of the term “scammer” has seen her emerge as something of an icon and downtown anti-hero. Love to hate her or just plain love her, Calloway isn’t going anywhere, and lucky for us, she’s here to talk about what she’s been into.

Without further ado

Caroline Calloway (instagram, twitter)

🎨 🛋 🎏 MOBILES

I almost didn’t want to recommend this one (or make it first on my list!) because I really want to make mobiles “my thing” and I don’t think I’m really “there yet” in terms of my personal brand. But type ‘mobiles’ into Etsy. Go on. It’ll change your fucking LIFE. You can buy all these amazing hanging sculptures from little artists around the world that take up literally zero floor space in your apartment and make you look like a chic Danish curator, just living your best mid-century modern life in Copenhagen with tasteful pops of irreverence and color! I own ten, which some people might say is too many for a studio apartment in the West Village, but some people are wrong.

🤵🏻 🦌 🌲 AUSTRIAN BLACK-TIE BLAZERS

Y’all. We have been SLEEPING on Austrian black-tie blazers. Tweed is everywhere. Everyone has a tweed blazer, AS THEY SHOULD. But everyone should also have an Austrian black-tie blazer because they’re sick as fuck, what Austrian people wear to fancy balls instead of tuxedos, and the buttons are made of ANTLER. Antler! I currently own two, but am actively looking to expand my collection. I get mine from (perfectly) (get it) Imparfait Paris. I especially like how warm the wool is and the lyrical, calligraphic emerald-green detailing.

🪄 🌸 💆🏼‍♀️ 🌺 ✨ SMALL HAIR CLIPS

The secret to flower crowns is that there’s really no secret at all! IT’S ALL SMALL HAIR CLIPS! Literally do not EVER put fake flowers in your hair because you will look like a terrible Coachella wannabe FRAUDSTER, but with small hair clips you can attach any fresh flower in the world to your head. Try to steer towards tropical blooms, like orchids, because those plants are able to absorb moisture from the humidity in the air and will therefore last longer. Bulb-based plants like daffodils and hyacinths wilt quickly as do anything in the Aster family (daisies). I like to buy my small hair clips for the minimum amount of money on Amazon.

🩰 ©️ ©️ 🥿 MANSUR GAVRIEL MONOGRAMMED BALLET FLATS

I wear mine, uh, literally everyday. Summer, winter; galas! When one pair gets too dirty and too worn-thin I buy another of the exact same pair. Pale pink base. Turquoise lettering. Cherry-red shadows. String tied in double knotted bows so they never come undone. It’s big Gossip Girl 2010’s energy and that is an energy that I am all about. Life was good! Natalie and I were still friends! I wasn’t addicted to Adderall yet! I literally had no idea that one of my best friends would sell me out for $5,000 to The Cut, take credit for my entire brand, and try to make it seem like I was never an addict at all! Buy these shoes!

🚫 👖 🚫 👠 🏞 A NO JEANS, NO HEELS LIFESTYLE

I just recommend it, okay? Normalize wearing elastic waistband pants to work! Normalize wearing sweatpants to everything! I’m not giving up, I’m just enlightened.

🧶 💐 🧵 🎀 ✂️ RIBBON

Uhhhhh ever heard of it? Listen. Get yourself a cheap-ass roll of satin ribbon on Amazon in whatever color sparks joy for you. I like powder blues and Tiffany blues, and very buttery yellows. Sometimes extremely chunky white yarn. Then the next time you are bringing flowers to someone, which should be the next time you are seeing someone, you just cut a generous bit of ribbon off, ball it up in your pocket, then when you buy the flowers take off all the plastic packaging and rubber bands and tie it with the ribbon. It makes a WORLD of difference. Trust me. Ribbon (or yarn) (or, hell, twine for all I care) is the thoughtful, personal touch that makes a 9.99 bouquet from the bodega look like a $40 arrangement from a florist.

🔭 🎮 ❇️ WATCHING OTHER PEOPLE PLAY THE SIMS ON YOUTUBE

Movies? Never heard of them. I like to watch other people play the Sims on YouTube. Actually just two people. Plumbella and Simproved. I actually have STRONG opinions about everyone else who plays the Sims on YouTube and that is: I hate them all! Except for Jesse McNamara (Plumbella), a communist miner’s daughter from the very most Northern tip of England, and Simproved, an anonymous German lady with a day jobs who enjoys making elaborate and fanciful “Sims builds” in her spare time. Plumbella.... Simproved... If you’re reading this—answer my dms!—I want to hang out.

🤘🏻💍💎🍇 MOCIUN CLUSTER RINGS

It’s all about that high-low mix, you know? Yeah I’m dm-ing European Simmers who don’t want to hang out with me, but on my finger is a $5,000 Mociun cluster ring. It’s called BEING A CONTROVERSIAL AND MYSTERIOUS IT-GIRL WHO GIVES THE PEOPLE SOMETHING TO TALK ABOUT.

At this particular moment in time I am not poor, but I am also not rich. Which is why it would pain me to count the ways that I have spent $5,000 and had it NOT end up being a worthwhile investment of my resources. I can say with absolute certainty that everyday I look down at my Mociun cluster ring and think: “Yeah... Well at least THIS was worth it.” And I didn’t even have to sell out any of my friends to The Cut to buy it! On a similar note, Caitlin Mociun sources all of her stones ethically—no blood money or blood diamonds for us, thanks.

💔 🧴 🫀 ✔️ SUPERGLUE

You’ll be shocked to know this, but I break things all the time. Vases, planters, hearts. That is why I always keep a tube of super glue in a tasteful ceramic bowl on my entry way table. Someone’s going to get mad at me for saying this, but I’ve even superglued fake nails back on. That’s right: Super glue directly on nailbed. Go ahead. Get mad at me. Try to cancel me! You couldn’t even if you tried.

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